domestic abuse, life, mental abuse, narcissism, narcissist, narcissistic abuse, Psychopath, psychopathic abuse

Psychopathic Lover

There can occur in a life
Such a violation of the mind
Such a raping of the very soul
That it is felt
In every living cell
Turning heaven into hell

When a lover betrays you
not with another
but a much deeper betrayal
of predator to lover
The kind that violates
the core of one’s mind

When such a soul rape occurs
The world is turned black
Perception is honed in
to see mental traps
People become suspect
Intentions are distrusted

The violation of a lover
who was innocent in intent
Wholly trusting in nature
Caring and kind with empathy
Loving the predator
unconditionally

Such a violation,
a soul rape, a mind bend
Distortion of reality
Causes damage to the core
Scars from the inside
Blackens the mind

This abuse of a lover
is so torturous to comprehend
So difficult to consume
Impossible to convey
to anyone who might help
they cannot believe the truth

The victim is left for dead
Heartwretchedly broken
Suffocated for words
Lost trust in perception
of their very reality
Lost in the psychopath’s nightmare

9 thoughts on “Psychopathic Lover”

  1. I have always said my now ex-husband emotionally raped me. I didn’t want to do it, he threatened to leave me and we had just got back together. I just after about 40 years have finally forgiven him and me for letting him do that to me. He raped my soul.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, I believe that. It is a very ugly thing what they can do to us.
      I am glad you are no longer with him.
      It is good that you have been able to forgive and let go of some of the anger. That is better for you and I do not think it hurts them at all for us to stay angry. It is just more attention for them.
      Even negative supply is still narcissistic supply.
      Annie

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      1. He has no idea what he has done to me. He tells everyone we had a great marriage. And on the outside we did. No one knew what was going on. He doesn’t think about forcing me to marry him by threatening suicide as anything. He thinks I was playing hard to get. I don’t understand completely, but the more i learn, the more I am understanding what happened to us.

        Liked by 1 person

    2. Narcissists will make you look like the bad guy and they come out looking innocent. They get to people before you do, so that by the time to go to tell them anything about him abusing you, he has already told them that you are mentally ill and not to believe anything you say to them.
      They have to maintain their image to the majority of the people. They only take off the mask for the closest “loved ones” in private and then deny it to everyone else.
      Have you seen the Self Care Haven youtube videos? I know that you subscribed to her blog. She has a book that I was planning to buy. And also a great youtube channel.

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      1. So that is why he made sure to tell people my mental illness embarrassed him. No I haven’t seen those videos yet. I have to get some time and look at them.

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  2. Yes, I am sorry to say that he probably did that intentionally. The most important thing to the narcissist is to maintain that false self that they show most people because that is how they are able to con people to get narcissistic supply.

    I used to think that the wife / girlfriend was the main narcissistic supply, but Sam Vaknin has a video about how the narcissist views their spouse / partner. We are not the primary supply for very long. We might be at the beginning.’

    We are actually secondary supply. I know…..it made me feel terrible too ! They see us as a way to maintain their memories of their greatness. Like to tell the stories of all the things they have done…like a historian.

    They also see us as people who should be getting narcissistic supply for them. If we are able to recruit new people for them…like new friends, new employees, new fans…then we have some value but they will still abuse us.

    When we no longer get them new narcissistic supply, or if we begin to see through their ways, they will begin the breakup. They plan the breakup usually way before we have any idea. They get their next victim ready while they are still with us usually and also they prepare the breakup.

    They start to tell people how we are abusive or mentally ill, They will tell people how kind they are being to us and they are putting up with our behaviors. They get people to feel sorry for them for putting up with us.

    By the time we tell people he was abusing us,, we have no chance to convince most of them. Sad isnt it?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes it is sad and heartbreaking. But it explains a lot too. I think the dynamics of the new girlfriend of 16 years now are different. She seems in charge. I can stand up to him now. He brought her in before I knew what was going on, but it got me away from him.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, I am so sorry to hear that. It is so painful and you feel like your brain has been accessed without someone’s permission to screw with your head.
      They can be so charming and difficult to resist. I know how they can play innocent and make you think that you are their angel to save them.
      Then you find out that they were leading a whole life behind your back that you knew nothing about and lying to you about everything.
      It is like your entire reality was wrong and you wonder how you can tell what it real and what is not. You lose your confidence in your perspective and your own perception of reality.

      I have been there. It gets better but it takes a while. The “red pill” moments do not all come at once. They come one at a time. You get hit with sudden “light bulb” realizations about things they lied about and how they manipulated you.

      Have you watched my YOuTUbe channel videos? https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCJw1QUDzb59PbWTcnGjGJ7g/videos

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